Top 10 Reasons to be happy about my Crappy Leg:
- I have been able to reinstate my membership to the "Laziness Club". This club of course was invented by me and a friend of mine when we were in High School. We both now have children so you are automatically kicked out of the laziness club once you reproduce, because as hard as I try, you can't be trully lazy with children. HOWEVER, now that I can't walk... I am lazy again.
- I got to eat Chinese for lunch. You might ask how that is something positive or has anything to do with my leg, but I don't have the answers for you. All I know is that on Thursday I wanted Chinese for lunch, but nobody else did, so I didn't get it. BUT today I got it. I think it's because people think I'm pathetic right now. (I'd have to agree with them too.)
- My mother is with me. You see she was supposed to go home yesterday night, but obviously you can't leave the cripple.
- A Vacation from the kids. I thought that my surgery was going to be some sort of quick out patient procedure, but it seems that I will most likely be there for 2 or 3 days. Last time I checked they don't let kids sleep with you at the hospital, so that means 2 nights without my cute little monsters.
- I will get a nice long scheduled nap, known as surgery. I am almost 100% guaranteed to sleep through the whole procedure.
- Kelly has not left my side. Whenever she is home she sits by me and waits for me to need something. She gets me water, snacks, breakfast, and lots of hugs and kisses.
- I automatically win ANY argument by default. Who is going to yell at little old me??
- I get a constant supply of happy pills... which I apparently need. Yesterday, I had some sort of nervous breakdown which included me yelling things like "Just take the whole leg" and "I don't think I will ever be happy again". Once the doctor uped my dosage, I haven't had any more of those erratic outbursts.
- I have always wanted my leg to look like a giant Banana... well that is just totally made up and untrue, but I was running out of positive things and I really wanted to make it to ten. Oh well! Maybe next time.
It's a bird, it's a plane... No It's just Tommy and a Giant Banana. Poor Poor Foot.